What is wrong with LeBron James?

We are all Witnesses, except this postseason, instead of transcendent play by our MVP, we are witnessing the lowest point of LeBron James's professional career (which, for all intents and purposes, began when he was sophomore in high school).  You all know what has happened in the past week or so, but why has it happened?  Here are a few theories:

1. His arm is barely hanging on.  If the name "Tommy John" is uttered in connection with LeBron this off-season, then we can all admire how amazing it was he was playing at all.

2. He was due for a rough stretch.  According to LeBron following last night's game, "(He) spoil(s) a lot of people with my play. When you have 3 bad games in a 7-year career, it is easy to point that out."  The odds alone say he was due for at least one stinker after having only THREE in SEVEN YEARS!!!  It's just unfortunate that it came during the biggest game of the season.  While we're quoting LeBron's post-game comments, can we all agree that his demeanor is bizarre, if not offensive?  Why is he so nonchalant, why isn't he pissed (did you hear Kevin Garnett?  He is already fired up for Game 6, calling it the Celtics' Game 7, and still calling the Cavs the best team in the NBA when they clearly aren't.  That's called RESPECT FOR YOUR OPPONENT, LEBRON!!!), and why is he such an ass about "spoiling people?"  Maybe...

3. He's on mescaline.  "Did you say mescaline?"  "Indeed I did."   

4. He's trying to get Mike Brown fired.  I've always liked Mike Brown, and have always thought he gets a bad rap, but if LeBron wants him gone, that means he wants to stay--albeit with a new coach--and if the choice is Mike Brown or six more years of LeBron, then don't let the door hit you in the ass, Mikey.  In all seriousness, this theory actually might have something to it, considering John Calipari and the agent he shares with LeBron were sitting courtside just days after rumors circulated that Calipari is LeBron's dream coach.  I hope it's this one, because the alternative is...

5. He can't wait to get out of Cleveland.  This is the most likely scenario, and the most fitting for a sports town that is getting almost too depressing to care about anymore.  

All this said, though, I still think the Cavs win in 7*.






*And then get swept by the Magic.