Power Poll Rankings of the Best 32 NFL Teams In The Land: Week 4

I wasted nearly five hours watching the Browns lose, missed the epic Monday night showdown in Minnesota, and lost my second straight fantasy week.  My enthusiasm for the NFL is at a season-low, but here's some Power Poll Rankings for you anyway.

More Of Me For You To Read...Again

I have a new post up at Herm's Perm.  It's the first edition of my weekly NFL post for them, so let me know what you think.  And if you're wondering, the NFL Power Poll Rankings will be up later today.

Lost Money and Earned Regrets: College Football Recap Week 5

For the first time this season, all five top 5 schools survived.  The big upset was UTEP exploding on Houston, while Miami bounced back from their trouncing at the hands of Virginia Tech to hold off the Sooners at home.

More of Me For You To Enjoy

Just in case you haven't gotten enough of me yet, I am also going to be writing for Herm's Perm, a blog run by two dudes from Kansas.  They're pretty funny cats, so make sure you check them out, and you can read my first post for them here.

NFL Picks: Week 4

I was feeling it last week.  If I had remembered that Matt Hasselbeck was out, that tally would be 11-5 (although the 'Hawks almost pulled it out for me anyway).  While I missed the two games he gave me shit about (Seattle and Tampa Bay), I want my old buddy Tim to keep his eye on the dollar bills as I make it rain with my winnings.

College Football Picks 10/1/2009: MattyWill Edition

#3 Alabama (-17) at Kentucky

MattyWill: 'Bama (-17)  This spread should be way higher. Does Vegas really think Kentucky will slow down this offense? LOCK.

My Pick: Alabama

#4 LSU (+3) at #18 Georgia

MattyWill: LSU (+3) I have no clue on this game; I am taking the points.

My Pick: LSU

#6 Virginia Tech (-16.5) at Duke

MattyWill: VaTech (-16.5) Thaddieus Lewis is my Heisman candidate but I look for V-Tech to keep it rolling in Durham!

My Pick: Virginia Tech

#7 USC (-4.5) at #24 California

MattyWill: CAL (+4.5) I thought Cal would be the team to beat USC in the PAC 10 but with that showing last week I'm not so confident but will stick by my pick!

My Pick: USC

#8 Oklahoma (-7) at #17 Miami

MattyWill: Oklahoma (-7) What a whooping Vatech put on Miami; they are still feeling it.

My Pick: Oklahoma

#9 Ohio State (-16.5) at Indiana

MattyWill: Ohio State (-16.5)  Indiana played Michigan tough but I don't see this game being close.  Ohio State's defense is tearing it up.  Hopefully T. Pryor uses his legs!

My Pick: Ohio State

#10 Cincinnati (-28) at Miami (OH)

MattyWill: Cincinnati (-28) A lot of points but I see a whoopin' here! LOCK.

My Pick: Cincinnati

SMU (+27.5) at #11 TCU

MattyWill: TCU (-27.5) I see a 4td or more win!

My Pick: SMU

#12 Houston (-16.5) at UTEP

MattyWill: Houston (-16.5)  I am on the wagon and I like this spread. 17pts wins it!

My Pick: Houston

Arkansas State (+20.5) at #13 Iowa

MattyWill: Iowa (-20.5) Iowa should be amped up coming back home after a victory at Happy Valley. Their defense is all over the field; hopefully they can score 3tds. 21-0 final?

My Pick: Iowa

#15 Penn State (-6.5) at Illinois

MattyWill: Penn State (-6.5) Has Penn State given up this year? Have they covered a game this year? I look for Penn State to show up and beat Juice by more than a TD.

My Pick: Penn State

Washington State (+32) at #16 Oregon

MattyWill: Oregon (-32) I don't like USC's offense.  It isn't the offense of past years. Oregon rolled last week and I look for them to do it again this week!

My Pick: Washington State

Utah State (+24.5) at #20 BYU

MattyWill: Utah State (+24.5) Maybe, just maybe!

My Pick: BYU

#21 Ole Miss (-9.5) at Vanderbilt

MattyWill: Vandy (+9.5)  Thought Ole miss was the real deal until they went to SC.  I'm taking the points!

My Pick: Vanderbilt

#22 Michigan (pick) at Michigan State

MattyWill: Michigan (pick) Michigan finds a way!

My Pick: Michigan

#25 Georgia Tech (-4.5) at Mississippi State

MattyWill: G Tech (-4.5)  They finally showed up to play last week! Maybe they will stay in the rankings this week!

My Pick: Georgia Tech

Matty Will: 16-24-2
Me: 19-21-2

Dr. Mangenius or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying About the Browns and Jump On the Bengals Bandwagon

Preface
Cleveland Browns Stadium, Monday, October 13, 2008

Sitting in the best seats I will ever sit in for a sporting event (50 yard-line, club box), sipping on expensive Bass beers, and enjoying the company of my father and his two friends, I witnessed the greatest Cleveland Browns performance of the expansion era. The 1-3 Browns, coming off a bye that-- were it not for an ugly week 4 win over Cincinnati--could have been the end of the line for head coach Romeo Crennel and struggling starting QB Derek Anderson, defeated the defending Super Bowl champions and previously undefeated New York Giants--who also came into the game with an 11-game road winning streak (tied for 2nd longest ever)--35-14. In hindsight, the score is shocking, but even leading up to the game no one would have believed it.

College Football Picks 9/30/2009

That's how we bounce back (sort of).  Underdogs South Carolina, Iowa, Oregon, Southern Miss and Virginia Tech made me look like a genius, while Florida State, Illinois, Clemson, and Arkansas reminded me of how big a dummy I can be.

Power Poll Rankings of the Best 32 Teams In The Land: Week 3

The Browns have a quarterback controversy (with Nobody holding a slight edge over both Brady Quinn and Derek Anderson), Chad Pennington is out for the season, and New York has two very good football teams.  If it wasn't for that last part, I would say it's any odd-numbered year of this decade, but since both the Giants and the Jets are good, it must be Tuesday in 2009, which means it's time for POWER POLL RANKINGS!!!

Holy shit...

Diminishing Skills is on Deadspin.  MISSION ACCOMPLISHED.

WTF Brady Quinn?

Did anyone else find it strange that in the second quarter of the Browns' 34-3 defeat at the hands of the Ravens, right after Jerome Harrison broke a 17-yard run to the Baltimore 48, Brady Quinn rushed everyone to the line for a first down-and-ten-yards-to-go QB sneak up the middle?  I turned the game off at that point (yes, out of disgust, but also because my girlfriend's grandparents had just arrived for lunch and I didn't want to swear and bite my hat in front of them), and when I saw later that Quinn was pulled for Derek Anderson, I assumed it had to be immediately after that play call (unfortunately not, however, as Quinn was allowed to finish the first half).  I just can't imagine any scenario in which that play makes sense.  And why didn't the other players stop him or call timeout if that's what he was calling out?  Maybe he just got scared or something and as soon as the ball was snapped he jumped forward.  Regardless, it made me laugh out loud, and is definitely the highlight of what has been a truly magical Browns season.  (Can they just fire Mangini now and save us the 3 years of disappointment?) 

Lost Money and Earned Regrets: College Football Recap Week 4

What a weekend.  Two top 5 teams (Ole Miss and Penn State) fell, while Houston kept their BCS hopes alive.  Oregon proved they aren't as bad as people thought, while also showing Cal isn't as good as people thought and Boise State just may be much better than people thought.  LSU ugly-slugged their way to a win again, while Florida and Texas destroyed far inferior competition.  Virginia Tech asserted themselves as the premier ACC team, while Florida State fell to their second consecutive in-state foe.

NFL Picks: Week 3

Yowza.  Between my NFL picks and my college football picks, I'm in so deep that I've got guys named Nunzio after my foreskin.  Hopefully I can hold them off for one more week, because I'm having a hell of time trying to scare up a Mohel in Washington Court House.

The QB Class of 2007: Worst of the Decade?

Considering the struggles of the top two quarterbacks taken in the 2007 NFL Draft--Brady Quinn and JaMarcus Russell--, and that Kevin Kolb--the third quarterback selected in 2007--looked about as bad as someone can throwing for 391 yards, I started wondering if the quarterback class of '07 is the worst of the past ten years.  To find out, I looked over the quarterbacks selected in each draft from 1999 to 2008, and then rated each player and averaged out those ratings to determine the average value of each draft year.  To read more about how I came up with the ratings, go to the bottom of the page.  To see the crazy spreadsheet I used to determine all of this, go here.  The results are as follows, from best to worst.  Enjoy.

College Football Picks 9/24/2009: MattyWill Edition

MattyWill is back to make his picks this week, and I was hoping that he may have helped you a out a little bit better than I did last week, but unfortunately he went 7-12-1, same as me.  So as of right now, the season stands in a bitter, ugly, 0-0-1 tie between the two of us.  Let's hope for some improvement this week.

College Football Picks 9/23/2009

Yikes.  Other than Florida State over BYU, I would have  been better off flipping a coin last week, and the only lock about my locks of the week is that they will lose.  You can still get rich reading this; just make sure you do the exact opposite of what I'm suggesting.

Power Poll Rankings of the Best 32 NFL Teams In The Land: Week 2

The Monday Night Football game just ended 2 hours ago (approximately), so that can only mean one thing: more Power Poll Rankings!!!  (Note: last week's rank is in parentheses.)

An Experiment

Rank the following in order of most probable to least probable, with 1 representing the most likely outcome and 3 representing the least likely.

• Peyton Manning will throw for 300 yards tonight.
• The Miami Dolphins will beat the Colts by more than 30 points, and Peyton Manning will throw for 300 yards.
• The Miami Dolphins will beat the Colts by more than 30 points.

Let me know how you rank them and then I'll let you know if you're right or not.  

Lost Money and Earned Regrets: College Football Recap Week 3 (Box Score Edition)

Full disclosure: besides the last two minutes of the Buckeyes game and overhearing a guy talking about Washington beating USC at the Cincinnati Oktoberfest, I did not have a lot of exposure to college football this weekend.  I missed the Thursday and Friday night games due to work, and then missed all of Saturday's actions (including highlights) due to some debauchery in the Queen City.  Therefore, all of my comments are based on box scores, so if you saw a game and the numbers don't really tell the whole story, let me know that I'm full of it.  Also, I'm going to rip off Bill Simmons (more?) and start a new section where I predict the lines for game involving the top 25.  If you don't like it (or even if you do), let me know, and I'll adjust accordingly.

Weekend INTERNET Road Trip

Since I actually interact with people (ok, person) on the weekends, I won't (usually) be able to write the 2000 word posts you've come to ignore so fondly.  In their place, I'm bringing back the INTERNET Road Trip, a look at interesting sports-related things found everywhere on the World Wide Web but here.  Enjoy.

• Bill Simmons's Week 2 NFL Picks column might be his worst effort in at least a year.  I hope he's not getting into another funk like he did when he was writing for Jimmy Kimmel because of his upcoming book release.  His recent work has been his best yet, and it would be a shame for him to start mailing it in again (especially since I don't think he has another rebound in him).
• Football Outsiders on why Auburn may, in fact, be quite good.  (I told you.)
• Possible impropriety involving Rich Rodriguez, 7 of his assistants, and more than $4 million in loans from the Bank of Ann Arbor (founded by Michigan AD Bill Martin).  The most disturbing item in this story is the fact that banks are still SELLING MORTGAGES TO INVESTORS!  Who the hell is buying them?
• A retarded kid scores a touchdown.  Am I going to hell because A.) I could care less; B.) I was hoping #30 was going to turn it on and run him down; and/or C.) I'm jealous of the little shoulda-been-aborted since I never even got to run the ball once, let alone score a touchdown?  (If you've ever seen me move in ANY manner whatsoever, you know that I deserved the same treatment.)
• NON-SPORTS LINK:  Louis C.K. on Conan, telling an airplane joke, uttering the phrase "People aren't as nice as they used to be," and, despite all of that, still being funny.  (I guess.  I'm still not seeing the greatest stand-up working right now.)